Put On Your Mask…

Be who you want to be

We have a phenomena in Holland called "Zwarte Piet". He's the helper of Sinterklaas- the person who inspired Santa Claus (yes, Sinterklaas was waayyyy earlier, he existed before Coca Cola:)). Sinterklaas has a long beard and gives kids presents. He is, by the way, based on a real person: a bishop from Turkey called Nicholas. But I'm drifting off. Zwarte Piet helps him, but is cheeky, even naughty, playful and very energetic. I used to play him for YEARS when I was in my teenage years. 

You know why I loved it so much? Because it gave me the opportunity to be everything that I wanted to be, but never dared in real life. 

I was shy, but not when I was painted black (that's 25 years ago, and we never thought of how painful it was pointing back to the slave days when this tradition started!). Again- that's not the point of this blog. The point is that being in a role, playing someone else, gave me the opportunity to play, to give in to desires that I never would have dared to being myself. I stood up to aggressive parents, climbed on roofs (I was afraid of heights!!) and made friends. 

What does this have to do with sex?? 

Haha. Yeah. Good point. But I just wanted to share one of MY stories to make clear how role playing can create for you an amazing way to play, be different, allow fantasies to happen. Also in the bedroom! I love being the whore- it gives me free space to be as sexy as possible, to talk dirty, to seduce, to be exhibitionistic... 

If you ever were dressed up for a party or a carnaval you can probably relate to my story. 

Role Playing? In the bedroom?  

If you have any fantasy that you would love to execute, role playing is your way to go. It's fun, it's safe! and it will give you the space to play... 

And not just you... also your partner. Once you are in a role, your partner doesn't have to think about you as you, but can treat you as their dog or their king, and who knows what will come out of that?? 

How To Do Role Playing 

Consent

Role playing together needs to be done in a safe space, and that means you need to agree on certain rules. In kink we call this: consent! You discuss upfront what kind of role play you'd love to execute. I will give you in the next paragraph a fun assignment to find out what role plays would be fun for BOTH of you to execute. 

Keep the rules

ALWAYS make sure that you keep the rules. Once you break it, it's killing for the next times you play. So, if you agree upfront that you will stay in the bedroom, don't go out to the living room. It can be as simple as that. Especially the first time that you're playing, really take this into account. 

A beginning and an end

Make sure that it is clear when you start, and when you end the scene. If it's not clear to you, it's confusing and might mess with you. Decide a word that you say, or a snap of a finger can also work. For beginning AND end! 

Assignments

Here's your first assignment to find out what role play fits you! 

This works best when you're together, without kids or friends. Plan a night out if it's needed. Bring a pen for both, and tons of small pieces of paper. Each time you think of a fun scene, or role, write it on a piece of paper, and give it to your partner. No need to discuss them yet! Just read them and smile- even if you hate your partner's idea- they dare to be vulnerable enough to share a secret desire with you and that is worth smiling and appreciation. Make sure both of you write at least 10. Make sure also to put in which role you want: if it's teacher and student, do you want to be the teacher or the student? 

Once you ran out of ideas (google is your best friend ey?), go through the pieces you got from your partner and select one that you would love to execute. Then take some time to dive in and ask your partner what they would love to do then, what a scene would look like, how would you like to be dressed and how would you like to see me dressed? Get to know your partners desires. Turn tables once you're done. 

And of course... why not plan a steamy scene next weekend when the kids are out at grandma? 

More assignments!

There are many, many different ways to play with role playing. I created 3 different assignments for you: a kinky assignment (an evening program so to say), a kinky ritual (something to perform every day for a week) and a kinky game (a game you can play, combined with cards, dice, etc. where I go all the way creative to make sure you have a fantastic evening). Wanna have them? Click on the link! From 17,- for 7,- 🙂

Play with passion!

Sam 

What would be a role that you would LOVE to execute one day? Let me know in the comments box below- and the best comment gets the assignments for free!